Things you will do with your hands

How to join in, rather than watch

None of this is difficult and nobody will mind if you get it wrong. But knowing the sequence turns you from someone watching a ritual into someone taking part in one — and that is a much better afternoon.

Purifying at the basin

手水舎 · temizuya

Every shrine — and, memorably, the dragon's mouth at Sensō-ji

  1. 01Take the ladle in your right hand and rinse your left.
  2. 02Swap hands and rinse your right.
  3. 03Back in the right hand, pour water into your cupped left palm and rinse your mouth from the palm — never from the ladle.
  4. 04Rinse the left hand once more, then tip the ladle upright so the last of the water runs down the handle and cleans it for the next person.

One scoop is meant to do all four steps. Don't refill.

Praying at a shrine

二礼二拍手一礼 · ni-rei ni-hakushu ichi-rei

Ryūgūsha, Futami Okitama, Ryūō

  1. 01Drop a coin in the box — a five-yen piece if you have one; go-en puns on ご縁, 'a connection formed'.
  2. 02Ring the bell if there is one, to let the kami know you have come.
  3. 03Bow deeply twice.
  4. 04Clap twice, hold your hands together, and say what you came to say.
  5. 05Bow deeply once more.

Walk in at the side of the torii, not down the middle — the centre line is the kami's own path.

At a Buddhist temple instead

合掌 · gasshō

Sensō-ji, Sōfuku-ji

  1. 01Bow once at the gate.
  2. 02Wash at the basin as above.
  3. 03At the great incense burner, pull the smoke over yourself — over whatever hurts.
  4. 04Offer a coin, press your palms together silently, and bow.

Do not clap at a temple. Clapping is for kami, not for buddhas — this is the single most common visitor slip.

Bathing properly

温泉 · onsen

The Izumi bath, on the way home across the Pacific

  1. 01Undress completely in the changing room; nothing goes into the bath but you.
  2. 02Sit on a stool at the taps and wash and rinse thoroughly — the bath is for soaking, not cleaning.
  3. 03Tie long hair up, and keep the small towel out of the water. Most people fold it on their head.
  4. 04Get in slowly. Stay as long as it feels good and no longer.

The Izumi bath is one of very few at sea, because the Diamond Princess was built in Nagasaki.

Ten more things worth knowing

Small courtesies that cost nothing and change how a place receives you. Open the ones you don’t already know.

Collecting a goshuin御朱印 · goshuin
  1. 01Buy the book first — a goshuinchō, around ¥1,500–2,000 at any shrine office. Futami Okitama in Toba is your first chance.
  2. 02Pray at the hall before you ask. The stamp records a visit you actually made, so the visit comes first.
  3. 03Find the desk marked 御朱印 or 授与所, open the book flat to the next blank page, and hand it over with both hands: goshuin o onegaishimasu.
  4. 04Leave ¥300–500 in coins on the tray, then wait quietly — it is written by hand and takes a few minutes.
  5. 05Keep the book for goshuin only. Station stamps and tourist-site stamps go somewhere else.

It is not a souvenir stamp but a priest's handwritten record that you came and paid respects — which is why the order matters, why nobody will write one for a friend who stayed on the ship, and why turning up at closing time may get you a polite no.

Writing an ema絵馬 · ema
  1. 01Buy a wooden plaque at the shrine office — usually ¥500–1,000 — and use the pens set out beside the rack.
  2. 02Write on the blank side and leave the painted face alone, unless the shrine's own sign says otherwise.
  3. 03Be specific. A wish is addressed to this particular kami, so 'a calm crossing home' beats 'happiness'.
  4. 04Add your first names if you like; the traditional address line is entirely optional for visitors.
  5. 05Hang it on the rack with the picture facing outward, and leave it there.

The temptation is to take the plaque home as a keepsake, but the whole gesture is the leaving — the shrine gathers up the year's ema and ritually burns them, releasing the wishes.

Wearing the kimono the right way round右前 · migi mae
  1. 01Wrap the right panel against your body first, then bring the left panel across over the top of it.
  2. 02Check a mirror: seen from the front, the collar should make a lowercase 'y'.
  3. 03Let the dresser tie and re-tie the obi. It is meant to feel firm and held, not loose.
  4. 04Take short steps, keep your arms low, and lift the hem slightly on stairs — the sleeves catch on everything.
  5. 05Sit by smoothing the back of the skirt underneath you rather than dropping into the chair.

Right panel over left is how the dead are dressed for burial — hidari-mae — and it is the one mistake a Japanese passer-by will genuinely notice, so if a staff member reaches over to fix your collar without asking, let them.

Chopsticks箸 · hashi
  1. 01Rest them on the hashioki, the little ceramic rest. No rest? Fold the paper sleeve into one.
  2. 02Never stand them upright in a bowl of rice — that is exactly how rice is offered to the dead.
  3. 03Never pass food chopstick-to-chopstick. Set it down on the other person's plate instead.
  4. 04Don't point with them, wave them while talking, spear food, or dig through a shared dish for the good bit.
  5. 05Take from communal plates with the serving chopsticks when they are provided.

The upright-in-rice and chopstick-to-chopstick taboos both come straight from Buddhist funeral rites — that is why they land quite differently from ordinary clumsiness, and why a Japanese diner will wince rather than laugh.

Shoes off, and the slipper rules玄関 · genkan
  1. 01Watch for the step up and the rack of shoes. That raised lip — the genkan — is the border, not the door.
  2. 02Step out of your shoes onto the raised floor, then turn and set them neatly pointing back the way you came.
  3. 03Wear the house slippers on wood and lino, but take them off before you step on tatami. Socks only on the mats.
  4. 04Change into the toilet slippers waiting inside the washroom — and change back out of them on the way out.
  5. 05Pack shoes you can slip off standing up, and socks you would be happy to be seen in.

Walking back into the restaurant still wearing the toilet slippers is the classic foreign-visitor mistake in Japan, and every single person in the room will spot it before you do.

Bowing, and managing without the languageお辞儀 · ojigi
  1. 01Bow from the waist with a straight back, hands at your sides or folded in front, eyes down rather than on the other person.
  2. 02Match what you are given: a small nod for a shop greeting, a slower and deeper bend when the thanks really means something.
  3. 03Learn four things and use them all day — sumimasen, arigatō gozaimasu, onegaishimasu, hai.
  4. 04Point at the item rather than the person, and hold your translation app out to be read instead of reading it aloud.
  5. 05Don't offer a handshake unless a hand comes out first, and never a hug.

The instinct is to apologise at length for not speaking Japanese, but a bow and a sumimasen have already done that job — it is the over-explaining in English that actually makes the exchange awkward.

Paying, and not tippingお会計 · o-kaikei
  1. 01Carry cash. Shrines, temples, market stalls and owner-run shops still take coins and notes only, and goshuin desks always will.
  2. 02Hoard your coins — small ones for offering boxes, ¥500 pieces for goshuin. Exact change is the courteous way to pay.
  3. 03Put the money on the little tray on the counter rather than into the cashier's hand, and lift your change back off the tray.
  4. 04Pass notes and cards with both hands, and expect your change to be counted back to you aloud.
  5. 05Never tip — not the driver, not the guide, not the restaurant.

Japan has gone far more cashless than its reputation suggests, but the exact things you will want to spend on here — offerings, charms, goshuin, street food at Nakamise — are precisely the ones that never took cards; and a tip left on a table reads as money forgotten, so someone will chase you down the street to return it.

Photographs撮影禁止 · satsuei kinshi
  1. 01Look for the 撮影禁止 sign before you raise the camera. Inside temple and shrine halls, assume no unless told otherwise.
  2. 02Never photograph an altar, a statue behind its screen, or a priest mid-ritual.
  3. 03Ask before photographing a person — camera raised, questioning look, and a shake of the head means no.
  4. 04Step out of the walking line to shoot. Blocking the approach through a torii or a shop doorway is the real offence.
  5. 05Silence the shutter if your phone allows it, and put the camera down entirely while someone beside you is praying.

On your kimono day in Asakusa you will be the one strangers want to photograph — the courtesy runs both ways, and you are completely entitled to smile and decline.

Tattoos and the bath入れ墨 · irezumi
  1. 01Don't worry about the ship. Izumi is run for an international passenger list and does not turn tattooed guests away.
  2. 02Ashore, assume the opposite — roughly half of Japan's baths still refuse, and the person on the desk cannot make an exception.
  3. 03Carry waterproof cover patches for anything small; plenty of places will accept a covered tattoo even where the sign says no.
  4. 04Ask whether there is a kashikiri, a private bath you can book by the hour, which sidesteps the question entirely.
  5. 05If you are refused, take it lightly and move on.

The rule is a leftover from the days when a tattoo meant yakuza membership, and it is genuinely loosening — Japan's tourism agency now asks operators to hand out cover stickers — but the staff member saying no is enforcing a house policy, not passing judgement on you.

Korea for the day두 손으로 · du son euro
  1. 01Give and receive with both hands — money, a card, a bag, a shopping basket — or steady your right forearm with your left hand.
  2. 02Never pour your own drink. Fill your partner's glass, let them fill yours, and hold your glass with both hands while they do.
  3. 03Take your shoes off at floor-seating restaurants and guesthouses, exactly as in Japan.
  4. 04Bow shallower than you have been — a nod of the head, not a bend from the waist — and skip the tip here too.
  5. 05Treat Jeju as its own place rather than a Korean footnote or a Japanese near-miss; the history between the two countries is not light conversation.

Two hands is the whole of Korean etiquette in miniature — it means 'you have my full attention' — which is why handing something over one-handed reads not as casual but as dismissive.

Draw a fortune before you go

You will do this for real at least twice on this trip. Here is a practice run.

おみくじ

At Meoto Iwa you will pull a fortune out of a bronze frog’s mouth; at the shrine above Katsurahama, from a shrine keeper’s hand. Shake the box, tip out a numbered stick, and the priest hands you the slip that matches the number.

Twelve grades run from 大吉 down to 大凶. Try one.